Green and growing

Do you like to grow things? 

I sure do.

I love having a big ole vegetable garden, but haven't been able to have one in some time now. 

I've had some really great ones in the past. Crazy thing is, I have no luck growing ornamental plants outdoors. Like, flowers for example. Even bulbs. I plant and plant, and it just never works out. Everything either doesn't ever grow at all, or dies. I had (had being the operative word here) two big aloe vera plants. I read that they would benefit from being outside once the danger of frost had passed. So I put them outside. Then they died. 

 I have an indoor garden instead! This is my jungle corner. It is my favorite area in my whole house. 

The huge tree like plant in the back? (Ya, I have no idea what it's called.) I started it from a tiny little cutting off of one of my sis in law's plant. 

I saw a post on Facebook about re-growing celery from a bunch purchased in the produce department. Do not mind my messy window sill and backsplash there. We had new windows put in A YEAR AGO and the inside is yet to be finished. This is my kitchen window, out of which I can see the neighbor's ladder to their pool.  

Back to the celery...I decided to give it a go and see what happened. So right there it is, in my kitchen window...the bottom off of a celery bunch.

And in this horribly lit photo, it has been growing for about a week...

Annnnd....a little longer.....and in the yellow and green pot, there are some succulents (I don't know which ones) growing from leaves that fell off of my other succulent plant. I just love it when one little ole thing turns into a bunch of other things, don't you?

And here it is as of today! It has roots and everything! So now it's time to plant it in some dirt, if I ever get around to that. I have no idea how long it will take to make new celery stalks. but I will be interested to see! I have another bunch of celery in the fridge waiting to be in some salads and stir frys and whatnot, and i'm going to regrow that one, as well. I just won't put them outside. 

I have a sweet potato vine started, too. It is taking it's sweet time but it finally has some roots. 

Speaking of growing things, here is grandbaby duck #2, running back and forth down the sidewalk. This little girl is something else! It is finally warm enough to utilize the wading pool (1.5 ft deep) on the days that it isn't raining, but at first she wanted nothing to do with it! I finally coaxed her in, and now she doesn't want to get out...ever! I guess there are worse things than an afternoon in the pool! (I babysit her 5 days a week.)

Baby Duck #3 and baby Roscoe were here for a visit this passed weekend. It was so great, and there is supposed to be a picture of Roscoe in this post, but I don't know where it is. I figured out how to post pictures to my blog from my phone, so I do that and then publish it. After that, I get on my laptop and edit the post with text, and it seems that transactions sometimes go awry. 

(I totally just had to google how to spell awry.) 

If you were wondering if the celery trick that you saw on FB or Pinterest really works, now you know! It does! Go forth and grow new celery!

Quack!

lopsided layers

So. I recently read a blog post about successfully blogging. Apparently, one must pick a subject and blog about that thing. For example, there are health and fitness blogs, food blogs, book blogs, diy blogs, etc etc etc. 

But lets talk about Ree Drummond, The Pioneer Woman, for a minute. I'm kind of a fan girl, to be honest, and I was following her blog before she got all super famous. But see...She doesn't blog about just one thing. She has food posts, and homeschooling post and gardening posts and ranch post and all kinds of posts! And she wrote an excellent book about the beginning of her life with Marlboro Man, and she has a cooking show, and cook books....

Not that I ever set out to have a "successful" blog. Or that I in any way compare to Ree Drummond. I mean...she is energetic and talented and funny, and she seems to be a genuinely nice person. Also, she has an interesting life on the ranch. Also maybe she has technological skills. 

I do, however, write about a variety of topics. This is a health and fitness food book random rant blog.  This is a blog for the untalented, uncrafty and undomestic but wish they were and keep trying.  Or, the untalented, uncrafty and undomestic who don't actually care, but want to make a layer cake on occasion.  For those who are on the ADD side of center instead of the OCD. Or, the talented and crafty and domestic who just want to laugh at somebody. Or whoever.

Today's post happens to be about food. So today it is a food blog. 

Actually, cake. This post is about cake. I saw a recipe on Facebook for an old fashioned butter cake. Now, I am 50 years old, raised 5 baby ducks, and have been feeding them for about 31 years. But I have never made a layer cake.  It just seemed so intimidating. My mom has made some beautiful ones over the years, and just watching her perfectly shave that dome off of the top...well, it just scares me. 

One time, I decided to trim Baby Duck 3's hair. It was about hip length when I started, and shoulder length when I was done. Because it was lopsided, and I kept trying to make it straight. Do you see where I am going with this? If I tried to shave a cake straight, I would end up with no cake, so I never even tried. 

Until yesterday. I just decided that I was by gum going to do it. 

So I did. Using the old fashioned butter cake recipe. 

Ha! There are crumbs on the table! I didn't even notice until right now! So that is the final result, and the thing got eaten. I must tell you, though, that the recipe did not meet my expectations. It is supposedly a one hundred year old recipe...when I told the Chief this, he said "It tastes a hundred years old." Bahahahahahahhaha! But seriously, the texture was weird and it wasn't really moist and delicious. The frosting was yummy, but it is pretty much the same chocolate butter cream that I have been making for years. Now, the reason the first photo is of a half eaten cake is because I am not technologically accomplished, and I was switching between my phone and laptop, and, well...that's just how it is. I also don't know why my text is not aligned on the left. 

The first problem I had in making this layer cake was pans. I don't actually have two round cake pans. Well, I do, but not the same size. I have three sizes of spring form pans that I have never used, a bunt pan, two angel food cake pans, about a dozen cookie sheets, a bunch of pie pans, and 4 13 by whatever cake pans, but the only round cake pans I have are the ones that I bought for baby duck 3's baby shower. There are about 5 of them, in graduating sizes, for a tiered cake. Baby duck 1 had left a round cake pan here, and so I picked the one from the tiered set that was closest to the same size, and ta da. There ya go. One was slightly bigger than the other. Both layers slope to the right. I don't know why. Probably the stove is not level??  I did not trim the tops. I did try to align the slopes. Anyway...I put a lot of frosting on and you couldn't even tell. 

OR maybe you can.  Also, I didn't have a cake plate to put it on, so that is a regular ole dinner plate and I kind of made a mess with the frosting. 

There you have it, my first attempt at a layer cake. I want to try again, but with a recipe that actually tastes good. I might even get a couple of same sized round cake pans. And maybe a cake 

plate. Except the budget is still squeaky tight, so maybe not. Maybe my next layer cake will still be odd sized, lopsided, and messily plopped on a dinner plate. But I hope that it tastes good!

The moral of this story is: make layer cakes even if they are imperfect and a little messy. 

Quack!!

I'm a fatty and I know it (but I work out sometimes).

Phone blogging! I guess we will find out together how this is going to work! Bet it will be a shirt post...No, not a shirt post, a short one! Sorry, I'm all thumbs right now! I attached some photos, but I don't currently know where they are, and therefore can't caption them.

The first is my dining room...it was dark red and now it is sage green, and I love it so much, and I wish I would have taken before and after.

Next is me and my oldest grandchild. We participated in a local 5k together, and it was super fun! I love that kid! I have two more 5k's lined up in June, and one in October!

The third is a pic of my second daughter, her hubby and my only grandson, Roscoe. They were here for Easter weekend. We made some memories!

Lastly, this is my scale. I gave it a makeover. I have launched a personal "Project Joy" in which I am no longer just enduring and powering through, But am experiencing actual joy in my life. This whole weighing and getting healthy thing has heretofore been dreary and depressing and painful, and I have decided that it is now going to be a joyful dance to my best self. So I painted my scale so that I would smile when I face it. It works, just so ya know.

If my pics don't show up, I hope you have a good imagination! The scale is an oceany blue with a sailboat on the bottom right corner, and a big fat sun on the top left.

And now for today's actual post subject...
I'm just going to go ahead and say it.
I'm fat.
Its not a secret.
At this point, there is no hiding it.
Its not that I'm a reasonable weight and just think I'm fat, like when I was in high school.
I'm actually fat now.
So what is so wrong in saying so?
Seems like there is a movement in the weight loss community where the word fat is a bad word. Curvy, full figured, plus size...
It all means the same.
Fat.
In many cases...but not all...definitely in mine...being this fat does indicate a certain lack of self discipline.
But so what?!
I'm not an Axe murderer, or a child abuser. Most people seem to like me well enough.
For the fat shamers out there...there are all kinds of human weaknesses...not being fat does not make you a fabulous person, or not. It just means you have different weaknesses.
So I like brownies and I would rather read or make greeting cards or chit chat with a friend over coffee than work out.
I am genetically dispositioned towards weight gain to start with, and yes that is a thing. Case in point: I birthed 5 kids. Three if them were (are!) skinny little things and two of them were chunkier. Served the same meals, raised in the same atmosphere.
Some medical conditions and some medications cause weight gain as well.
Having said all of that, I'm well aware that my fatness is causing health issues.
Even if I were to get back to ideal weight, I won't have a perfect body or be a head turner, but I will feel better and improve my heart/bp issues.
Sorry, that was for the fatty haters...I saw this subject discussed on Dr. Oz (just a short clip on YouTube, I've ditched the TV habit...didn't take long to get tired of all that mess, and I'm having the cable turned off for the sake of saving the budget) and got a bee in my bonnet.
Back to the subject: I don't  understand the avoidance of the word fat. It is what it is, and I already know that I am.
Clearly, though, I desperately need to change that. And so, here I go on my joyful dance towards good health!

Did I mention that I recently turned 50? It was sort of anticlimactic. So here I am, half a century old.

And I'm pretty sure I'm done now!
So I'm now going to post this and see if my pics show up!

Quack! (oops I'm.missing a pic)

Sprung Spring

     I wish that decorating my home was one of my strengths, but it's not. To be truthful, I can't even hang pictures because they won't be straight, or I will have 50 new holes in the wall because I didn't get it right. Also, i'm not that crafty. In fact, domestic stuff in general bores me to tears, and also, not very good at it, which makes me wonder what I AM good at and why didn't I do that, make an income, and hire people to do this stuff for me since NO ONE WANTS TO HELP ME.  I truly admire other peoples pleasingly appointed homes. There are several in my own family that have a knack for it. I don't know why they won't help me. All I ask is to keep my books and my plants, and to not spend a billion dollars.
    I'm thinking about this at the moment because it is spring. I haven't cared much all winter while in hibernation mode. Give me cookies and a book and i'm all good. But now the sun is shining and the weather is mild, and i've been out for some walks, and suddenly my house feels musty and clutter-y and suffocating and I am in full spring cleaning mode. That means that I got up this morning, got a wild hair, and started throwing stuff around, and now I have a big pile of junk that I don't know what to do with, and it is still pretty ho hum up in here. I'm still in my jamies at 1:26 in the afternoon. And all I really did was straighten up some bookshelves. You know, i've seen in some homes and online interestingly decorated book shelves. But I don't know what to put on mine to make them all pleasing to the eye, and also they are mostly filled up with BOOKS, and that is only maybe 1/4 of my book ownership. I need more bookshelves to put books on. Actually, I need a whole room of bookshelves filled with my books. So where am I supposed to put pictures and doo dads and stuff, and why don't I have pretty picture frames to put the pictures in to put somewhere instead of a drawer full of pictures that I fully intend to frame and put somewhere?
      Woe is me.

     Speaking of books, who has read any good ones lately?
     No romance novels.
     Nothing bittersweet, heart wrenching, or tear jerking.
     Nothing creepy or scary or morbid or sordid.
     Nothing with a sad or anti climatic ending.
     Maybe something with a heroine who is actually likable, interesting, courageous, independent, without being annoyingly pig headed and ridiculous...and possibly with a triumphant ending?
     Anybody? Anything?
     Has anybody read any of Cecilia Ahern's books, besides PS I Love You?
     I think I will read some YA's. But I hope to get ahold of some that are NOT littered with cursing and adult situations. I might need more Harry Potter.
     Speaking of Harry Potter, I really need a new set of them in hardback. Mine are pretty worn out, and a new set would be more attractive in my book filled bookcases.

     There is nothing about having my heart shredded that is of entertainment value to me.
     There is nothing interesting or romantic about going about my day, just another normal unremarkable day, and then getting that phone call that changes everything in just a few uttered words.  "I have bad news..." "I don't really want to tell you this, but..." " Oh my gosh, did you hear..." "ma'am, there is a body in that lake and you need to prepare for the worst"
     That happened to me again yesterday. Audrey and I had had a lovely walk that morning. The weather was just beautiful. The other girls had a half day at school because spring break has started, and that's always wonderful! After my daughter picked up her girls, and I was home alone with a quiet peaceful Friday evening stretching before me when I got the call. Just a little earlier, I had seen a post on Facebook that said "Biker down in Roswell, check your friends" and had immediately thought of my kin back "home" who ride, not really thinking that it would be one of them. But it was.  Our nephew (on the hub's side), cousin to my kids, son to my beloved sister- and brother-in-law. Horrible, horrible accident all dramatic and traumatic, and now another set of parents have joined the "Grieving Parents Club", another mama is burying a baby, and three children are without their father.  He has brothers and aunts and uncles and cousins and a grandma and a billion friends...all who's lives changed just. like. that.
     And he was one of Joey's pall bearers.
     And i'm so sad!
     For his parents and immediate family and his children.
     For all his extended family and friends.
     For The Chief.
     For me. I love that kid! He always made me laugh!
     For every mother who has lost one of her babies.
     Of which there is a startling number....

     Life is bittersweet and heart wrenching and tear jerking. These are not the more interesting aspects of living. Certainly not ones that I want to read about for escape and entertainment! Key word here: ESCAPE!!!

    I was already having a struggle with any of my kids (even though they are grown) going anywhere and doing anything, and not suffocating Last Baby Duck with overprotectiveness...

     Bleh.

    Moving right along:

     Okay! I'm going to work on spring cleaning some more!
     Happy weekend!
     Quack!

   

Secrets exposed

    "Life is too short to read depressing books." Susan Elizabeth Phillips
Isn't that just the truth?
I don't actually read much of SEP's work (although, as romance writers go, she's pretty good...and pretty funny!) I just am not really into the whole bodice ripper scene. I roll my eyes so hard sometimes that i'm afraid that they are going to get stuck up there. I used to read them by the dozens, but I guess I burned out and moved on.
   
      So I recently bought a pricey loaf of multi-grain bread, and was half way through the loaf before I discovered that this particular loaf of supposedly whole grain bread had LESS fiber than Mrs. Baird's "whole grain white". WHAAAAT?? So I went on a bread expedition to search out fiber, and the most I found was in Sara Lee Delightful multigrain. 90 calories and 5 grams of fiber per 2 slice serving. In case you are concerned about the fiber content of your bread. But, you probably don't eat bread, because I think that "bread" is a dirty word nowadays.
     What can I say, i'm a rebel. I eat bread. Sparingly, like peanut butter toast for breakfast, but still. There is my deep dark secret. I eat whole grain bread occasionally.

     I'm elated that it is March! Not that the weather has been particularly March-like. But the cold and snow has to stop sometime soon, right?? That reminds me, though, that April is next wherein I shall turn 50, and I might be having a bit of a passed-mid-life crises. I mean...50?? Really? Good for me, I guess, for making it to 50, but unless I live to be 100, which is doubtful I am already passed mid life, and I still don't have myself lined out. I may be running out of time.

    I wonder where you stand on the time change occurring this weekend? I know that some people just love it. I do not. I keep hearing that we are going to get an extra hour of daylight, but is that accurate? Isn't it just moving to the other end of the day? So when I am trying to wake up and get going in the morning, it is going to be dark longer, and when I am trying to wind down and get sleepy, it is going to be light. Personally, I still have to get up and go to bed at pretty much the same time...now that is going to be an hour earlier. I already have a ridiculous issue with those two things...going to bed and sleeping...then getting up in the morning. I am a night owl by nature, which makes the darker mornings/lighter nights appealing, but I have worked for years and years to over come, simply because with kids and a hubby who gets up and goes to work and whatnot, I haven't had the luxury of going with my natural flow.  I am now at the place that, with 10 mg of melatonin, perhaps a benadryl, and a passion flower capsule, I can accomplish sleep most of the time, and I can get up when I need to most of the time, and be semi functional. It is going to take ALL of spring and summer to adjust to the time change, and then right about the time i'm okay with it, it will change back. Bah humbug, that's what I have to say about that.

     Our first 5k is coming up in just a little over a month...I hope the mild weather holds so that I can get outside and hit the walking trail! Otherwise, the date of my demise will be April...uh...something. 18th? 23rd? Something like that.

   Babiest babiest duck (Roscoe) is here with his mom for the weekend! Good times!

Quack.

It's all Greek to me...

     When one asks the universe for answers, sometimes an answer is given.
      Take me, for example.
      In my last blog post, I was talking about being overwhelmed and confused about all the different "diets" and "weight loss plans", etc etc that are out there, and how in the world are we supposed to figure it all out? As it happens, I did more than talk about it. I pondered on it, and threw it out there to the universe, and here is what happened.
     The very day that I wrote that blog post, a "Living With Heart Failure" newsletter came in the mail. In it was an article about the Mediterranean Diet, stating that it was excellent for heart health.
     And I already had a book! I hadn't read it, but since it said "diet" on the cover, I bought it for a quarter at a garage sale, many moons ago. Since I am a book hoarder, I still had it! So, I read it. It was very dry reading and a lot of blah blah blah, but I managed to ferret out the gist of it, and had a little bit of an "aha" moment, but didn't give it a lot of energy, because I do have a bad habit of jumping on bandwagons without enough information.
     BUT! The NEXT day, I got a couple of magazines in the mail. I subscribe to three magazines, all of which I am bored to death with and hardly ever even read anymore, but never remember to cancel them.  I just happened to flip through one of them (Yoga Journal) and i'll be buttered and called a biscuit, there was an article about The Mediterranean Diet and heart health!
     There was no choice but to research. Guess what? There is tons of information, recipes, etc. etc. online for free! But, even though I said I was never ever ever ever EVER going to buy another diet book, I did. But it was only 6 bucks plus free shipping (holla for Amazon Prime!).  When it came, it was fun to read, simple, yet informative.
     It is not a "diet" that somebody made up. It wasn't formulated by a doctor or a fitness buff or who ever it is that concocts these diet plans. It is the way that actual people on the coast of the Mediterranean eat, and have eaten for forever! This area is a "blue zone" area, where health and longevity are the norm. A place where the incidents of heart disease, diabetes, certain cancer and Alzheimer's are VERY low, as well as depression/anxiety, and metabolic syndrome. (Too be sure, if I lived by the ocean I would be less depressed, too.)
    It's not a weight loss "plan", but a way of eating that encourages whole body health, which  then encourages excess weight loss! There are no strict rules or deprivation or counting anything. It is also economical. No weird stuff, unless you consider feta cheese to be weird, which I kind of do.  It does not require extreme workouts. It does encourage walking at least 30 minutes most days. There are no recommended supplements.
     Two of my favorite lines: "When eating well tastes like a yearlong vacation, it's easy and exciting to do!" and "The Mediterranean Diet isn't just about healthful living:it's about joyful living."
     I needed a refresher on what places are actually Mediterranean, so I looked it up.
There are several others as well, but I could be Spanish...or Italian...
   OR...i could be Greek!
I actually don't know very much about Greece except for Aphrodite.
I was going to say: "Wait...don't Greek women have mustaches? Oh, never mind, I do too so I would fit right in." But I actually don't know if that is a Greek stereotype, and if so, where I got it from.
So I looked it up. I got a page of Greek women images. Apparently Greek women look like models. Or maybe they were models, I don't know.
Not sure I would fit in after all.
But I do have an olive complexion.
   So i've decided to be Greek, and my Greek name is...Andromeda! You can just call me And.

     If we are going to get technical, the Mediterranean way is not that different than the advice given by health/weight loss moderates...IE, Sparkpeople. But shush....this is my mind game.

     I once knew a Greek boy in high school. I was good at high school (but haven't been particularly good at anything since), and every year I went to State Deca Competition.  This boy was there every year as well. I think his name was John, but he had a very long complicated Greek last name. We sought each other out each year, walking the mall and having lunch together. Not only was he very cute, he was also very nice, and perhaps if we had email or text messaging 30+ years ago, this might be a longer story. I wonder what became of him?

    One more message from the universe: just yesterday "Cooking Light" showed up in my mailbox. I've been getting this magazine for probably 3 years and never have used one of their recipes. But this current issue was chalk full of recipes that fit right in with the Mediterranean Way.

   I don't have unrealistic expectations, unlike my hot mess of a friend Vivian. She is panicking that she is about to be 50 (she has the same birthday as me) and that summer is right around the bend, and is now determined to lose 60 lbs in the next couple of months.
Personally, I have decided that I am going to focus on heart health and see what happens, while mentally living on a Greek island.

   Valentine's day has come and gone.
    I made some homemade peanut butter cups for my fella. Audrey "helped". By that I mean, she sat on the counter and ate ingredients, and then bonked her head on the floor when I took her off the counter and put her down, against her will.  Then I painstakingly shaped the peanut butter mix into hearts, (at the dining room table, not the counter) which took some time, and then Audrey smashed them, so the didn't turn out very heart shaped.  They were kind of hard to dip in the chocolate...it got pretty messy. In the end, they weren't pretty, but they were delicious and well received anyway!

    Know what else happened that weekend? The 50 Shades movie came out, and has been the subject of much conversation and debate. (I did not see the movie. Just read the books, and enjoy getting to rant about it.)
    This is all I have to say:
    A.) Why was this wealthy, handsome but messed up guy interested in Ana? Oh, because she was mousy and he could "mold" her. No other reason. Not that plain unremarkable people are unworthy of attention, but really, there has to be something to attract a rich good looking guy, who probably has a choice of many...like, a personality, or amazing character or something. Ana had nothing.
    B.) "My tastes are very singular." BOOOOOOORING!!!!! I bet before too long, Ana would be all "really? The room again? Siiiiiiigh. Ok." and then will proceed to practice the times table or make a grocery list or mentally redecorate until it is over. And she will be saying (even if just mentally) "Get away from me, freak! Let me feed the baby in peace!"
   C.) If I were C's parents, I would be suing a therapist. Evidently, he/she was incompetent, if he was in therapy all those years and still that messed up. Clearly C was born psycho. (I personally know kids who suffered hideously at the hands of their relatives, and then suffered more in the foster care system, were adopted into a loving safe stable family, and are amazing well adjusted kids!)
   D.) If you get involved with a "bad boy", you are going to get stuck with a "bad boy". I did not get the "ooooh, but if you look past the sex, it was a great romance." Um. No it wasn't. It was two messed up people in a dysfunctional relationship, and probably their kid is going to be dysfunctional, as well.Adult people that messed up cannot be saved by "true love"., at least not the human variety. It just doesn't happen and it is irresponsible to pretend like maybe it does.  (Personal experience, right here! It was ugly.)

     And also, I have deduced that maybe this weird story was maybe written by a man and passed off as being written by a woman!
   Because: An absolute innocent and a man with plenty of experience....
                   A whole room just for sex!
                    Teenaged C having "a relationship" with a much older woman (and not being upset by it)
                    That Ana was all worried about ever displeasing him...
                   He was controlling down to what she ate....
That's all "boy stuff".
       The only other explanation is that "we" as women in the collective sense, have taken our liberation to the extreme in that "we" have become men.
     Also, I don't really know much about "fan fiction", but that is what 50 Shades supposedly was, inspired by the "twilight" series.
      Fan fiction sounds an awful lot like trying to rip off someone else's idea, but if that's the case this man failed miserably! Whatever you do or don't think of Twilight, (I was team Jacob all the way!) at least Edward was a gentleman and refused Bella's advances because he did not want to hurt her, and he held out all the way until after they were married.
     I don't really think this is Twilight fan fiction.
     I think it is probably Anne Rice fan fiction.
The only reason I know this is because, having purchased the 50 shades on my ereader, all kinds of wierdo stuff popped up on my suggested reading list, and I am the curious sort. As it happens, Anne Rice wrote an "erotic" trilogy about...guess what...submission/bondage.
  The most disturbing thing about all this is that TEENAGE girls are all over this. We are going backwards.
    And now i'm over it and moving on!
    Pssssh....get on outta here with your "my tastes are very singular."

     In other news,  I'm looking at participating in something like 4 0r 5 5k events in the next few months, the first in April and the last in October...one with inflatable obstacles and one involving foam...so someone better get to training!

    Hope you're all having a fabulous weekend...my fella is home, but he has man flu...


Sincerely,
And
   

Come with me now

     I recently read an article about plus size models. Did you know that they wear pads to make them more "plus size" in certain places?? Like hips and bum and boobs. Their waists/bellies are not padded. Therefore, it is not a true representation of plus sized women, and those clothes do not fit actual plus sized women like that. That's pretty bogus, if you ask me, but what might one expect from the advertising world? Never mind actual real people of a certain size that might enjoy looking and feeling nice in their clothes. Let's just manipulate them into spending money on disappointment!

    I also recently read an article (I read a lot of articles) about another diet. It was actually in that one weekly mag that features a different "diet" every week. What surprised me is that this is a diet plan that I have only heard of from one other person, and didn't actually get that it was a "real" thing. So it's the "Fit Healthy Mama" diet, and the premise is: One can eat both carbs AND fat! Just not together.  If  one has a higher fat meal, it should be low carb. If one has a high carb meal, it should be low fat.
      This makes a certain kind of sense, and seems not too complicated. Until you think about it for a minute. What exactly do they call "low carb" or "low fat"? Clearly, one of my favorite breakfasts of rye or sourdough (higher in resistant starch) toast with peanut butter and a banana would be a no go.  Carb, carb, fat. Nope.  My other favorite breakfast of eggs, asparagus, and half a grapefruit seems like it would fit, if the eggs were cooked with a tiny amount of fat.  (Who ever would have thought of having asparagus for breakfast?? Not me, but it was in the meal plan with the Brazil Butt Lift program, and I tried and loved it! Too bad asparagus is so seasonal...and pricey.)
    I will spare you every thought I had, but I was curious and wanted to know more and lo and behold, there is a book on Amazon for this diet plan! I desperately want to read it, but it costs $30.  I have purchased and read SO MANY "diet plan" books, and now i'm over it. I refuse to get sucked into another one.
    It seems to me that this whole thing should not be so complicated! I mean, come on! There are a bazillion different "diet plans" and each one has a compelling argument for it. (Also someone somewhere is making a bunch of money on it.) I have tried many, including good old fashioned calorie counting. I have lost a significant amount of fat twice, and then regained it...twice. (Incidentally, yo-yoing is not good for the heart.)  It stands to reason that the best "plan" would be the one that is actually a change in eating patterns forever! Of course, I have read this a bazillion times. This is what Sparkpeople preaches constantly. But I hate counting calories, and know myself well enough to know that that only lasts a short time until i'm fed up with it.
    The truth is, I have to lose the weight again. Clearly, I am not vain enough to keep it off for appearance sake. It truly is a matter of life and death.
     Once upon a time, I had an hourglass figure.  Now i'm an apple. Or, a pumpkin. One of those prize winning giant ones. Most of my fat lands right on my belly, and that is why I really just need some maternity clothes.
     And, well, belly fat is the worst kind of fat, cardiovascularly speaking.

Did you know this is heart health month? Red Dress and all that. Since this has recently become a subject of great interest to me, let's talk about that!
     I'm a woman. I'm 49 years old. I have spent the better part of 4 years attempting to outrun my genetics, which leans towards heart disease. Losing weight, working out, etc etc.
I have a strong immune system and hardly ever get sick. When I do get sick, it's pretty mild. For example, if everyone else in the house is puking up their guts, I feel a bit nauseous.
     But I have heart "disease".  I didn't even know until it almost killed me! I mean, who would of thought??? I didn't have a heart attack. I don't have high cholesterol or clogged arteries. I actually thought I had pneumonia which my doctor was treating me for. So when I could not breath, I just waited for the antibiotics to work.  If my daughters had not insisted that I go to the ER, I  might well have died. Turns out my heart was not pumping effectively, and all of me was filling up with fluid, including my lungs and around my heart.  Boom, congestive heart failure. The very thing I was working so hard to avoid. And GUESS WHAT? The whole event was likely exacerbated by all the water I was drinking!!! As it turns out, the more fluid I drink, the greater my blood volume, and the harder it is on my heart. So, i'm on fluid restriction. Really!! Opposite of what we are told for healthfulness!!
    I had pre-eclampsia with baby 3.
    I tried to take birth control twice, and was removed from it twice, because it caused high blood pressure.(Hence, 5 children.)
    Did you know that these are indicators of future heart disease?
    I did not.
    Apparently, i didn't read enough articles about it.
     Incidentally, the fact that I had gestational diabetes is an indicator of future diabetes that I also have to watch out for.

This is my life, and why it is imperative to lose this belly fat.
If we're going to be real and honest, let's just say that cake is not allowed in this house from this day forth. Not that I can never have a piece of cake, but it can't live in my house, because I will eat it until it's gone.
Also, Burger King runs must cease. Often, after running around after Audrey all day and then needing to clean up after her and do my own stuff,  i'm not overly enthused about cooking dinner for 2 or 3 people. It is far easier to get fast food, and if you know i'm on a tight budget, it's less expensive for two people than my random grocery shopping.
Clearly, those two skill sets needs addressing...cooking for two (or three) people, and efficient grocery shopping.
My plan is to nourish my body moderately and normally, without excess thought about this or that or whatever, with food that contains actual nourishment and in reasonable portions and get the exercise in, and not eating out of boredom or for emotional reasons.
We will see how that goes.

And now you know the real root of my weight issues.
And I do too.

And i'm almost 50. 5-0. FIFTY!!!! Whaaaaaat????? How, what, when??? 50???
It's not that I mind growing older. To tell the truth, the forties have been my best decade yet. (As far as being comfortable being me and whatnot...)
But 50?
I'm pretty bummed, because four years ago I was certain that I was going to be one hawt fit granny by 50, but i'm actually nearly right back where I started from, and it's only two months until the big 5-0.  That makes me irritated with myself and also discouraged.
Also, I can pretty much guarantee that I am PASSED middle age. I mean, barring random accidents or catastrophic illness, it still is unlikely that I will live to be 100.
Certainly not, if I don't get heart healthy.
It's not that I mind aging, it's that I am forced to face my mortality and to think about all the things I have wanted to do that I haven't done, and the clock is ticking. My life has not gone at all how I meant it too, and i'm running out of time to change course.
If I had it all to do over again, I would have done something useful with my brain and been the Chief's sugah momma.
Is it too late for that?

 We are thinking of looking into getting a treadmill for the house. That way, we could go for a walk only wearing sneakers if we wanted too! I mean, I wouldn't want to, but it would be an option! I might like to see the Chief do it, hahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa!!! Anyway, we will see how the job and the budget go, but it's a thought.


   It has been beautiful and sunny and warm the last few days! It is just sooo glorious to feel the weight of dark and dreary lifted up by one ray of sunlight!

     Sun hits you, Hallelujah!
     Sun hits you, Hallelujah!
'Cause summer funk gonna give it to ya!

That's a paraphrase.

It is amazing to me how warmth and sunshine changes the whole landscape of my thoughts and feelings, and I know that another freeze and probably more gloom and cold are somewhere in the near future, I have seen the light and i'm ready to take on life again!

How 'bout you?

  Whoa, come with me now!
  I'm gunna take you down!
   Whoa, come with me now!
  I'm gunna show you how!

I don't really know what that means, but that's my jam.

Quack.