Curiouser and curiouser

     My poor little blog has been woefully neglected lately! I haven't actually thought much about it...i'm a busy girl, ya know, between school and homework and running around after the grand baby. I'v been attempting to take better care of myself, which takes some time, and both grand babies had birthdays and we have had a baby shower since last I posted!
    This funny thing happened this weekend: my mom (who is hanging out with me for awhile to help me juggle all of my stuff while I finish this class and try not to die) my daughter Savanna, grand baby Natalie and I decided at the last possible moment to take a weekend road trip. Doing things at the spur of the moment hasn't always been my style...I like to mull it over and come up with every conceivable reason why I shouldn't do a thing! The past couple of years, though, have taught me to venture outside of my comfort zone.  We were headed to a church convention that actually began on Wednesday, but Savanna couldn't miss school, having just been home for a whole week  with hand, foot and mouth disease. That is not the same as Hoof and Mouth generally reserved for livestock. It is actually a funky virus, that seems to be maybe sort of like chicken pox, but the rash only appears on the palms of the hand, soles of the feet, throat and mouth. Normally, children under 5 contract this virus. We aren't entirely sure how Savanna ended up with it...but she did! So we could not begin our road trip until she got home from school. We put our hometown to our back around 4:30 in the afternoon. The first place we got lost was about 30 miles from home, in the first town we came too! (e got lost in the same town on our way home.) 3-ish hours into the trip, at Sweetwater, Tx, we stopped to eat, and then Savanna took the wheel while my mom navigated from the back seat. It was dark by this time, and if you don't know from Facebook, Savanna only recently got her license, and we do live in small town america. So here we go, on the interstate, and that got really interesting. Among other things, Savanna is not used to driving my car and it took a few miles for her to get a feel for it! I thought we were possibly going to die, but we didn't.  Hours later, we were off the interstate, wandering around in the dark in unfamiliar territory, and several times we had to turn around and go the other way! Our destination was Mountain Peak, and try finding that on a map! Finally, we were nearing the place, searching in the dark, and well, Savanna may have taken her eyes off of the road and forgotten she was driving for a minute, because she put us in a ditch right across from our turn off! But we didn't die. There were people waiting for us, but when we got to the place, there was NO CELL SERVICE! Apparently, that does still happen outside of scary movies! It was one am by the time we got settled!
Later in the morning, I made the acquaintance of a lovely lady. She mentioned that I looked familiar, and as it turned out, she recognized me from this blog!!!!
WHAAAAAT??
I truly believed that the only people who read this blog were the peeps on Facebook who love me and felt obligated to read it!
Apparently, that is not true!
And so now I feel a little more motivated to keep it up!
To all of my invisible readers, HI!
And here is a shout out to my new friend Kristen from Sulpher Springs (or Mineral Wells...?) Anyway, you know who you are!!
I don't know if it is lack of oxygen to my brain, the meds that cause drowsiness and dizziness, or if i'm just getting stupid, but I feel a little bit like Dori these days. (Not YOU, Dori from Tennessee, Dori from Nemo!) :)

So we had a fabulous Saturday and half a Sunday, I am SO SO SO glad that I agreed to this impulsive road trip. We headed back home after lunch on Sunday, this time with me at the wheel, as Savanna remembered that she actually left her license at home!!

^^ That is grand baby Audrey on her very first birthday on Oct 4th. That is, 10-4 in this family with roots in truck driving.

^^This is Savanna and I the day we ordered her class ring. We went on a mom-daughter date afterwards.

^^^ Chanelle's baby shower! Oldest daughter Charity, Chanelle and I. I guess we picked a really bad weekend, as we didn't have many guests, but it was great fun anyway, and Charity picked the best baby shower games! Baby Hill is really making his/her presence known. The Hills have made the decision to keep that nugget of information unknown until the new Hill makes it's debut into the world.

^^ Here is Audrey, talking on the phone! Well, not really, but she thinks she is.

Recently, a vintage market was held at our local event center.  There were quiet a few of these vintage travel trailers fixed up and showcased, and now I really really think I need one so that I can fix it up just how I want and use it for a writing studio!! (A room of one's own and all that!)

^^^ This is a truckstop on our road trip route! That was Sweetwater.

^^That is my car, and I just like taking pictures of my car. Because. I like my car.

^^^Savanna and Natalie, at Cracker Barrel, on our trip home.

^^Me and my mom, across the table

This is Savanna and Trevor. Facebook recently announced that they are "in a relationship". I think that means that Trevor is Savanna's boyfriend.

^^And this is the Hill family! They spent the weekend in Colorado on a "babymoon"...a last vacay as a childless couple before the baby comes! 

I throw random pictures into my blog, because it just doesn't feel like a proper blog without pictures! 

My writing class is going really well! 

Poetry is not my favorite thing ever, but we are required to write four of them in this class. 

Here is my first one:

Mama Duck

had five little ducks

and a handsome drake

they laughed and quacked and splashed

around

in a little lake.

Haha, not really. I did not turn that poem in.

Here is the real poem that I turned in:

Grief came for me

On a bright June day,

Riding a wild stallion

The color of muddy water.

Thundering hooves

Carried me away

And we rode that horse,

Grief and I,

Through violent storms,

Over treacherous ground,

Across burning desserts

And raging rivers.

Mile after mile-

Day after wretched day-

Through months-

and years.

Still we journey,

Reluctant companions,

Down still valleys

And along quiet meadows

Now on a gentler steed

and I hold the reigns.

-Valerie Russell

This poem was well received and no changes were made during workshopping. Now I have to write three more, and this one took forever!! 

And so I better get crackin' on that project!

Quackity quack!

It's been verified...I am big-hearted!

      The coughing started in mid-July, an innocuous irritating little thing that hardly was worth a second thought. A month later, it was a monster, rattling my ribs, clawing my throat, and stealing my breath. Well, thought I, it has been a humid summer so probably I have a little bit of asthma acting up, or possibly just allergies. After all, my granddaughter just had seen a doctor about her growling chest cough, and that was her diagnosis for which treatment was effective. Finally it occurred to me that maybe I should just go get it checked out, perhaps I did have bronchitis or something. Even though I didn't feel "sick" so to speak and wasn't running a fever at all. I have had bronchitis before and definitely had a pretty high temp.
     It was the first time I had consulted a doctor in 5 years, just because I don't really get sick often and when I do, it's just mild...so I haven't had any real reason to go to all the trouble of lining one up and making an appt and whatnot. (We have moved since my last check up.) I was able to get into the office quickly, as my daughters and granddaughters and niece and greats are patients there.
     The doc said that he heard something funky going on in my lungs and so I had a chest X-ray and some blood work. Hm, well, it appears to him that I have an enlarged heart, and that I am FREAKING anemic (his words), and so he prescribed a zpak for pneumonia (actually he said there was a fuzzy shadow in my lung that he was going to treat as infection...later dr's used the P word.) Then when that was cleared up, we would more closely examine the heart issue.
     I took my Z-pak as instructed, and was also on a high dose of iron 3 times a day. The z-pak helped some, but I was still coughing, still gasping for breath, my chest and ribs still just hurt, and plus the iron was doing really bad uncomfortable things to my guts! I hadn't slept in several days and nights...just dozing 10 or 15 minutes here or there...and I was just waiting for those antibiotics to kick in! But I was kind of miserable and exhausted and one Sunday evening my daughters convinced me to go to the ER. I personally thought that that was over-reactive and over-dramatic, but I thought that at least maybe I would get a breathing treatment and some sleep! I was just a little desperate for oxygen and sleep.
     SO!!! After a long night and some bloodwork and a ct scan,  This is what happened. I was sent in an ambulance to the big hospital in Lubbock, because evidently my pneumonia was really pulmonary edema (or something like that) and there was fluid building up around my BBH (big beautiful heart) because I have, formerly unbeknownst to me,  Congestive Heart Failure, or CHF, and I was in the process of drowning in excess fluids.  SO I guess having an extra big muscular heart is a BAD thing, causing it to not pump efficiently.

There I am ^^ newly installed in my room.

^^^ Some visitors!

And...my pain chart.



     The first day in the hospital, I had a bunch of test done....another chest X-ray, and echocardiogram (that I failed) and a stress test that I did not like! I was pretty much told that I was staying put until all that fluid was out of my chest area and other tissues, and thanks to the failed echocardiogram, I would have an angiogram later in the week.

^^^ Some more visitors...aren't they cuties?? Niece Brittany, granddaughter Audrey, and great niece aamiyah.

^^ Some remains of the grand cuisine I was served. I guess I should be grateful that they let me eat at all, but golly...I was for some mysterious reason on a diabetic meal plan, and it was just uninspiring. One morning, whole wheat french toast was served...with sugar free syrup. Ya know,  there are just some things that if you can't have the real deal, you might as well just not have it at all. Sugar free syrup is one of those things!

^^ This is my new room! On the second day I was in the hospital, the entire cardiac floor moved! This was interesting in that the poor nurses were running around looking for their supplies and equipment, much of which had already been moved! The reason for the move was that another floor had just finished being remodeled, and so we were moving to brand new digs! I was actually the first patient to be moved and to take up residence! They piled all my stuff into my lap, and wheeled me away...I felt like a should have a tiara and a princess wave! The new room was much bigger and nicer, and that sunflower picture sure did cheer me up!

^^ That is a skywalk, connecting two wings. I walked up and down it quiet a bit.

^^^That there, folks, was my favorite place!! COFFEE!!! Except, I was on fluid restriction so I didn't get that much. And I kept getting questioned about exactly how many cups I had. And I sometimes had to just suck on crushed ice because I drank too much coffee.


     The only other times I have been in the hospital have been to give birth. Those are pretty short stays, ya know, so i'm not really an expert on hospital beds.  What I can tell you is that mine was an air mattress, which seems new and different, but it has been almost 18 years. Pretty basic model, I think, with the buttons to move the angle of head and feet. What was interesting about it was that it would noisily and randomly move all by itself. Not just head or feet, but random points in between. I asked every single nurse (and throughout my stay I had 8 different regular nurses, and a few aides) what was up with my bed moving all by itself, and none of them ever actually answered me...they were just like..uh, I dunno.  So. that was interesting and maybe a little annoying.

     Until the restrained me to the bed.
     Oh yes they did.

^^What you see there is  a padded ankle restraint that was used to tie me to my bed. This, of course, was after the angiogram, a procedure after which one must not move the leg in order to prevent arterial bleed-out.  So, while I was tied to the bed...it was a huge relief when my bed would randomly move FOR me! I finally understood.

^^^ That is just a picture of one of my many IV sites. The bruise you see there is actually from the initial IV in the emergency room that went wrong. I still have that bruise 11 days later.  Over all, I had four different IV sites, and blood drawn every single morning.  Also my blood sugar was checked like 4 times a day, so lots of finger pokes, and I also got shots in my stomach every morning..a medication to prevent blood clots. So my poor jelly belly is all black and blue! At one point, I had to have a blood-gas draw, which is blood taken from an artery, and those are a little deeper than veins.  The technician went in my wrist and hit a nerve! Holy smack-a-nurse, that hurt! I'm not really a big baby when it comes to pain but that made me holler out loud!


   Over the course of the 5 days that I was languishing in a hospital bed, 5 different people came into my room and claimed to be my doctor. Does that not seem suspicious? How many doctors does one person need? I was pretty thoroughly confused.  Every time I turned around,  someone new was coming in, saying they were my doctor and telling me to lose weight.  Among other things. I think I finally figured it out, though.  I had a cardiologist, and he has a nurse practitioner, and then I had a general doctor, and he also has a nurse practitioner. So those four became pretty familiar to me, although I still am not sure why i needed four different people visiting me and telling me exactly the same thing.  I have absolutely no clue who the 5th person was.

     My really funny sister-in-law came to visit me one day, and we did what we do...laughed a lot!! One thing we were talking about that had us giggling was my bulletproof coffee adventure. Being an incompetent blogger,  i have no idea how to link a former post here, but not long ago I wrote about bulletproof coffee, which is just coffee blended with coconut oil and BUTTER! Mine was not made with just any butter, but IRISH butter,  ya know...anywho, SIL was mentioning about how I was going to have to lay off of butter coffee, and the Chief would be relieved that he didn't have to pay for IRISH butter anymore. (In reality, I actually only stuck with butter coffee for about a week. It kind of lost it's charm, even with IRISH butter.)  The nurse came in a little later, after SIL had left, and mentioned that our laughter had caused them to laugh, and they wanted to joint our party, wondering what was so funny.  I told her the butter coffee story....

And so she wrote this on my board!! Teehee!! We were wondering how many others would ask about it. Only one ever did!! 

    As it turns out, I actually do not have a cholesterol problem or clogged arteries. I do have CHF, and a damaged heart, but they can't tell me exactly what caused the damage. It is suspected that it was caused by poorly controlled high blood pressure, but they can't say for sure. So. All of my tiredness and moodiness and lack of good humor did have a cause after all.  If I do everything i'm supposed to do...take a handful of meds, keep my BP under control, lose weight, exercise moderately, limit sodium, and stuff like that, there is a possibility that my heart function will improve, and at the very least not deteriorate. Possibly some year in the future, I will require an implanted device.  Or, I can just do nothing and die sooner than later of CHF! So. I guess that I will take my wretched pills. I will work hard to release these regained pounds into the wild, and I will take my 30 minute walk every evening. And I will lay off the coffee, as I am restricted to two liters of fluid TOTAL for the day!!!! I have to weigh every morning to make sure i'm not becoming water logged again. Oh, and I have to REST. So now I have a verifiable excuse to take naps!  I have a follow up with my regular doc next week, and then a follow up with my cardiologist (ya, i'm the kind of girl with a cardiologist!) at the end of Sept., and then an echocardiogram in 3 months to check my heart's status. 

     This is me and Audrey, headed out for our first daily evening walk!! 

And I guess that's all, so quackity quack! 

Ew.

One should not write blog posts in the middle of the night when one has been awake for far too long and is under the influence of narcotics. Therefore, the original post has been deleted.
The gist of it was:
I went to the doc for the first time in 5 years. It didn't go all that well, except I did get antibiotic and cough syrup for this ugly bone jarring cough that I have had for a month.
And I have to get super serious about getting my weight back down and getting regular exercise and all that wheehaw.
That is all.

Moody Grays

I have this pointless little blog that is about nothing.
It's not about junking or decorating.
It's not a cooking blog.
It's not about country life or urban farming.
It's not a book blog,  an art blog,  a crunchy blog, a health and fitness blog, or an anything blog!

I don't even take good pictures.

My blog is about nothing. Except, perhaps, me...and that is not all that interesting!
Which is why I haven't written a post since the beginning of July!

Frankly, i've been in a mood for quiet some time, and I don't really know why. I mean, certainly there are daily challenges, and things that I like to call adventures that aren't really adventures but just things to cope with and get through, but I have had MUCH bigger, less funny adventures in my lifetime and I have so much to be thankful for, and NO REASON to be in a funk!!!

And yet, I am.  I mean, I am here living in a gray cracked house, and that should be hysterical, but i'm not really laughing.  I should be considering trim colors that go well with gray...I mean, gray is sort of  a neutral color, and pairs well with red or yellow or bright white or pink....but, ok, I obviously have thought about it for a minute, but mostly I just want to shoot my house and track down that one guy who made such a mess of it and cement his feet. We have been told numerous times that we should just sue him, but its seems to me that that is a lot of money and time and hassle with no benefit .
Speaking of gray (or is it grey?), I see that 50 shades of grey is being made into a movie, and I don't even see how the filmmakers are managing THAT and, even with today's extremely lax standards, making it suitable for public consumption! Seems like the movie will have about 5 scenes it it and last half an hour. Not to mention....REALLY???? All the stories in all the world, and THAT is the one being made into a movie? I'm just speechless.
Actually, i'm not speechless at all, I have a whole bunch to say about that, but guess what? I won't. Because my opinion of the whole shebang is the extreme minority, and that in itself is highly disturbing. (Um, yes I did read the books. No, i'm not a prude or a party pooper or a stick in the mud or a cold fish, or whatever anyone might want to say. It was just a BAD story, bad plot, bad characters, just bad bad bad. Except the writing was halfway decent and that just compounds the whole tragedy.) I just have to ask, am I the only one who sees the irony that there is so much hoopla and hurrah over women's LIBERATION, and this story about SUBMISSION AND BONDAGE is so extremely, shockingly, mindblowingly popular? WHAT???!

Summer has pretty much passed me by, and I can't even fathom that school supplies are on the shelves and summer apparel is on the clearance racks!
On the upside, I don't have to ferry S. around this year, as she is now the owner of her own vehicle (with a sunroof! I'm kind of jealous!) On the other hand, she will be driving. By herself. And that strikes deep intense fear in my heart. My last little duck has wings. Or wheels, if you will, and is just mere months away from 18!

I'm really looking forward to fall, but not to going back to school. I am terrified of the class I am taking, and I have SO MUCH anxiety about it, and I would almost rather be taking college algebra! At least I know what to expect and that even though I completely suck at it and I have to work really super extra hard, I can learn it and even score an A in algebra. Imagine, taking a writing class and finding out that that is what I REALLY suck at!

Anywho,  this is my life: My days are spent keeping the baby clean, fed, entertained, and alive, and fishing foreign objects out of her mouth. and feeding and attempting to entertain the tween and then the momma comes home and i cook and do whatever stuff I need to do in the evenings. And then on the weekends, I catch up with whatever didn't get done. And also I obsess and stress about school about to start. And I am feeling sort of hermit-y and introverted, which isn't all that normal for me, but there you have it. That mood thing.

I suppose that wraps up this random issue of the nothing blog!
Until next time..
Quack!

June Follies

   
I started out this month (June I mean) with a bang, that's for sure! On June 2, the day that Savanna was supposed to register for summer school, but we did not know that, I killed a kitten. A KITTEN! I had to make a grocery store run. I jumped in my car, backed out of the driveway, and then stopped at the intersection at the end of my street. At the appropriate time, I made my left turn onto a main street, and then I heard a thunk. Looking in my rear view, I saw one little kitty making a desperate run for it, and one...not running. It was not running because unbeknownst to me, these kitties were up in my car, and they fell out when I made that turn, and I ran over one of them. It was HORRIBLE! When I was in the grocery store shopping, I overheard two women talking about how someone ran over a little kitty in front of that church by Beall's and it was awful. (That was me. I ran over a little kitty in front of that church by Beall's.) That made it better, let me tell ya!
The very next day, I had to take Savanna to summer school, so just to be sure, I looked under the hood, honked the horn, started the car....no cats. Cool. However, as I was driving, I heard something moving around IN MY CAR! Savanna and I looked at each other, and I pulled over and stopped. Sure enough, kitten under the hood! It was wild as all get out, and Savanna ended up getting bit, and it disappeared....still in my car!! I was not about to murder another kitten, and so I called animal control. They came, but couldn't find the cat and said there was nothing they could do without taking my car apart, and probably it ran out already.  I then cautiously continued the journey to the school, went inside and registered Savanna, came back out and cautiously drove home. Later, i went outside and a sad momma cat was laying under the car...but no kitten.  I went out again that evening, and there WAS a kitten! As soon as it noticed me, it ran right back up in my car. I did not drive my car for a week, and then I got fed up and called animal control. They set some traps and caught the cats and took them away to somewhere that they would have food and shelter and be fine.
   About the second week of June, the stucco job on our house was finally done! It was supposed to take a week, but it was a month,

     Tada! My improved dwelling!!

Not really, the above photo is not our place. The below photo is. It remains cement colored.  One might wonder why it is yet unpainted.
It is not painted because a week after it was done, the stucco started cracking and cracking and cracking. It turns out that the fella and crew that did the work are being sued by another client and still another is refusing payment. Yay us! I have no idea how this story will end, but for the time being, we gave our life savings in order to have a grey cracked exterior. I'm excited.

     On June 7th, I participated in the second Color Run for the summer with daughter Chanelle and her mother and sister-in-law. It was fuuuuuuuun!!!!!

Also during June, this little gal became independently mobile! Now I spend all of my time sweeping, mopping, keeping foreign objects out of her mouth, hunting her down because she no longer stays put...and sometimes she falls, and that makes her upset.

     Chris and Charity both had b-days this month! They are 28 and 30 and I can't hardly take it in that I have kids these ages! Super happy we were together for the turning-of-the-page!

Before that, there was the anniversary of this (my pics are out of order, oops) and also the anniversary of my dad's passing on the 12th. We were all kind of funky that week.  Two years later....well, i'll just say it's something we are still learning to live with. I love that just recently...around the end of May, I randomly met a lovely woman who is the mother of one of Joey's good high school friends.  She was telling me how Joey championed her son, who others kind of picked on, and was his friend, and how much that was appreciated. That was Joey! And it does a mamma's heart good to hear these kind of things about her child, even two years after his death! It also makes a mamma cry a little that this (although he was sometimes a pain in the neck) great kid is not here anymore.

Are picture captions supposed to go before or after the photo?? Huh. Well. Mine are before. These are my sneakers. I'm putting them to good use, and am back on carb rehab. I already feel a ton better and have lost 6 lbs! 19 to go...and then some more after that. I know that the lo-carb is pretty controversial in some circles, which is why it took me a seriously long time to even consider it, but now I don't even care who says what. I'm sure that it isn't for everyone...but it is for me. Having tried it in desperation, and finding that it makes me FEEL so much BETTER, it is my friend! Less joint aches, headaches, etc...less brain fog and lethargy...AND I don't retain fluid like a sponge! My blood pressure is lower and feel much more inclined to move...and my MOODS are far better. I can't actually see what is going on inside my body, but I take my clues from how I feel.  For the record, I get plenty of fiber as well. The VERY low carb portion is temporary, not forever.  I sometimes struggle with craving crusty italian bread dipped in hot oil, or a tortilla, or a (box of) twinkies...but those cravings become fewer and farther between with time and persistance. I am trying like crazy to also break the diet coke habit...I am really curious to see how avoiding aspartame affects the process! I did recently come across a great recipe for peanut butter mousse...whipped heavy cream, cream cheese, natural pb, and a small amount of stevia. It tastes like peanut butter pie filling, which is divine in my opinion...and this concoction helps to tame the beast!

We have had some really lovely rain!! Note the wet table. This picnic table is a fun addition to our yard, thanks to The Chief. He toted it home last time he was in town!  One evening we ate Subway sammies at this table. It was extremely pleasant! that was before carb rehab.

I have read some books during the past couple of months, trying to find that escapist relaxation, but alas I haven't had a lot of luck. As a disclaimer, one should not necessarily read or not read any book based on my opinion, as apparently I just don't like anything anymore. I don't really know what's up with that, but here's the rundown:

Up first was historical romance, which I don't read very often...romance, historical or otherwise is not my favorite. I used to read them by the fistful, but life and age and experience has changed my perspective and now I don't have much patience for them. However, there are a few authors of this genre that are so good at their craft that I sometimes read one anyway. One of those is Amanda Quick, and I read her newest book, Otherwise Engaged, and didn't hate it. In fact, I enjoyed it.

Next up, and this surprised me, was Mauve Binchy's Chestnut Street. Um, I didn't even finish it. I'm not a big ole fan of short stories in the first place, and it seems like all of these were gloomy tales about cheating spouses, and I do not have time or desire for gloomy. 

A winner was Spider Woman's Daughter, by Anne Hillerman. She is the daughter of Tony Hillerman, who passed away and left his readers Leaphorn and Chee-less, and that was sad, but now Anne is attempting to continue the story. This book was not quite as good as Tony's, but it was still very good and I enjoyed reading it.

More sadness is being disappointed by Dorothy Benton Franks, who's work I have always enjoyed, but I did not love "the hurricane sisters".  It was very meh, and there wasn't even a hurricane. 

"The fault in our stars" was another huge disappointment. I don't hardly ever read those tear jerker, heart wrenching kinds of things, like some of Nicholas Sparks and Jodi Picoult. My heart is wrenched enough by my real life, and I don't care to have it wrenched for escape and entertainment, so when I first started hearing about "The fault in our stars" and kind of got the gist of the kind of story is was, I didn't even pay attention to it. But there was more and more hype, and then my daughter saw the movie and assured me that yes it was sooooo sad, but also so good, my curiosity got the best of me, and Kindle had it for 4.99 so I read it. Gloomy, without anything to redeem the gloom, I did not form any kind of attachment to the characters,  and I thought that the whole "teen speak" of...like, or whatever, and you know? clashes wildly with the sophistication of much of the books language, including that of these teenagers. Also there was a lot of profanity and a teen sex scene, and call me old fashioned or whatever, but I object to sex and profanity in YA books. Yes, I am very very clearly aware of the culture among our youth and that sex and profanity are not rare, but it is my opinion that the adults who are writing YA novels, while I understand that they are shopping for a large readership,  have a responsibility to hold up a higher standard for our youth. So as far as YA, I will be sticking to Harry Potter and Percy Jackson. Both series have huge readerships without sinking to that level. 

Then there is Janet Evanovich and her Stephanie Plum series. Yes, I did read #21. No, I will not read number 22. Stephanie has run her course. There is nothing new in Stephanie-land. Her cars are still getting blown up and her apartment messed up, still going to viewings with her grandmother  and she still hasn't made any kind of a decision between Ranger and Morelli, and frankly it's just old and no longer interesting. So if someone will kindly let me know if and when she ever wraps it up, I might like to read THE VERY LAST BOOK in this series. 

I started "Still Life with Bread Crumbs", but I got several chapters in, was bored to tears and not invested in any of the characters, so I stopped. 

The next book I am going to attempt is by an author that doesn't appear to be widely well know (and those kinds of authors are usually the most enjoyable in my own personal experience). It is entitled "The Darling Dahlias and the Texas Star" and was authored by Susan Wittig Albert. Ms. Albert wrote some really good books (in my opinion) that were fictional stories about Beatrix Potter, and involved a little mystery, a little romance, and some talking animals and I really enjoyed them, so I am hopeful for this book.

I am looking forward to October and the release of John Grisham's newest offering and hope really hard that it meets expectation! He hasn't let me down yet, but then neither have some of my other authors until now. 

As an end note, I am aware that many of these authors are best sellers and I have written nothing, and that these stories are beloved by many. These are just my opinions, and my own frustrating issues with reading material lately! 

And THAT, my friends, is the end of a very long blog post! Hoping for a safe and happy 4th to all! 

Summer, glorious summer

IT'S SUMMER BREAK!!! Weeeeeeeeeeeehaw!!!!!!!
SUPER excited for summer break. I love summer. Summer mornings, summer nights, summer afternoons...i'm a little embarrassed to admit out loud that I revert to my natural body rhythms during summer break. I stay up late until I am truly sleepy enough to go to sleep without "help"....(Zquil  is my friend)...and sleep until I wake up! It is glorious and so much less stressful than trying to force sleep at a proper bedtime....I LOOOOOVE waking up when my body is ready to wake up, to the sound and feel of the fan blowing, feeling rested and ready for action! (I do still wake up to call the Chief and wake him up, but getting to snuggle back in and go back to sleep is even BETTER!) Of course, when fall comes and school starts, I have to then endure the pain of adjusting my sleep habits and taking out stock in Zquil again. But that is weeks and weeks away!!
But wait.
Some people around here have real jobs, in which they must get up, get dressed and leave, and said people have an infant that will be left in my charge, and infants have no concept of summer hours. Hm, guess we will see how that goes!
I'm not sure why I feel so excited about summer. The eternal optimist in me, I suppose. The ever hopeful heart that beats in my chest.  When I stop to think about it,  every hard dramatic traumatic thing that has happened in the last few years (like, 5 maybe?) has occurred during the summer. And if it wasn't something dramatic, it was something that was a pain, like moving.  These past handful of summers have not lived up to my summery expectations in any way.
And yet every spring, my lil ole heart pitter pats a little faster, my blood gets some zippity do dah going on, the heavy grey clouds of winter dissipate and the sun shines right into my soul!
Tomorrow is June first, and I think it is probably irrational to fear June, but now that I am forced to acknowledge her imminent arrival, that is my reaction.
Now, that sounds somewhat contrary to what I JUST said about thrilling to the beat of summer. However, "June" and "summer" are separate entities in my thought process.
As a refresher, my baby duck 4  died June 11, 2012, and my daddy died June 12, 2013, and for two Junes in a row baby ducks 1 and 2 had June birthdays completely overshadowed by loss and death and funerals, and Father's Day was as well. So ya, I actually am afraid of June, and can't help but wonder if we are all going to live through it.
I have a bunch of projects lined up for this summer, and i'm not sure why! Even with school stuff behind us for awhile, I still have a pretty full schedule. I still will be caring for Audrey for at least 8 hours a day, and keeping Natalie entertained and NOT in front of the computer 24/7 all summer! Then there are plans with niece Brittany and here three littles. BOYS! We have to keep 2 energetic messy loud boys,(in other words, typical normal little boys) an infant and a 2 year old, AND a pre-teen entertained! The reality is, I won't have more time for blogging,  or writing, or long hot afternoons reading, or getting my life all organized and lined out so that when school does start again...for the kids as well as myself...it won't be so hectic....
Not complaining...just sorting out fantasy from reality...I love aaaaalllll the kiddos, and we shall have fun!
What I WILL have to figure out how to do is paint the ENTIRE house, inside and out!
We are under construction...or destruction, depending on the moment.
The chief has been talking about new windows for a couple of months now, and has been longing for a new storage building/shop for months and months and months. I didn't really know we needed new windows, except the previous ones did not open and that was a pain. Just a little over a month ago, Mr. Big Chief calls to tell me that someone in going to be coming by to do an estimate on a new storage building, and the next thing I know, well...the siding is being ripped off my house and windows are being removed, and i'm writing a lot of checks.
This whole thing was supposed to have been all done in a week, but it's been a month now. I kind of
expected that, having already lived for 49 years, and have had a lot of life experience. Always, always expect it to take longer and cost more.
I reserve judgement until final outcome, but let me tell ya, I am not crazy about the experience thus far. Beyond the noise and the mess and strange male faces popping up in my windows at random times...this guy we "hired" is trying to get this business going on the side. He actually has a "day job", and he ended up all up in my life because he did work for one of the chief's co-workers.  It was sort of a handshake type deal....a remote handshake at that, as the chief spends most of his time on distant locations with bad cell service, which makes the whole process all that more interesting. So first regret, not getting an actual written contract. The terms have changed a couple of times over the course of the month. The prices for materials have been noticeably  more than what we were orally quoted.  And frankly, I just don't like this guy much. He is a strange loud cocky little man. He talks a lot, has a sailor mouth, and is just full of all kinds of bull! I don't actually know how many children he has, or ex wives, because it changes every time he tells it. He informs me, every single time I see him, how smart and talented and hard working and all around wonderful he is, and what a fabulous break he is giving us on cost, which immediately makes me suspicious about all of those things.  He constantly talks trash about women, white people (HELLO??? What color and gender do I look to you??) black people, and pretty much anyone thats not him. So ya. I don't like this guy. But that's just a personality disfunction, at least in my opinion, and not a reflection of the actual quality of the work. I shall reserve judgement on that, as I said, until it's done. I'm not sure that the stucco on the shed should be cracking already, but what do I know? We did have all of that lovely but unexpected rain! There are a few things that just don't look right to me, and when I question, he tells me "That's the way the boss said he wanted it.", but when I ask "the boss" about it,  he is unaware that that is what he said he wanted. That is a whole other adventure, The Chief supervising this process from hundreds of miles away, on remote locations, with bad cell service. Fortunately, much of the time that one guy is not here, just his crew. The downside of that is that his crew doesn't speak much english, and I don't speak much spanish, so when there is need for communication it gets interesting. However, Savanna knows some spanish, and has figured out how to use her phone for translation purposes, so on the occasions when these fellas do something, say for example, stucco over the dryer vent, she can communicate with them about it. (By the way, this has been A LOT of hard work for them, and they work steadily for hours and hours at a time. Gotta hand it too them for that!!!)
    When they are all done (supposedly this weekend), then it will be my job to paint. I have been asked a few times why we didn't get already colored stucco, and i'm a little confused about the answer to that, but as far as I can figure out, it would cost a whole bunch more for already colored stucco. Apparently, stucco isn't big around here...although, I believe it's about to boom, as numerous people have stopped by to ask who is doing our stucco work, they would like to have it done too...and if we went to New Mexico we could get the stuff to color stucco much much less expensive and more readily than here.
    In any case, our stucco is cement colored, and my job is to paint it. The whole house. And the shed. And also INSIDE the house. The new windows aren't the same size as the old ones, and there is some drywall work to do inside. Originally, this guy and his crew was supposed to do that work too, but in the course of things "the boss" told them to forget it, he would do it himself. I don't know when he supposes he will have the time or energy to do that, but anyway....there is at least one window in every room of the house, which means dry wall work in every room in the house, which means painting in every room in the house. So I have my work cut out for me!  You know, in the odd minute or two I have between tending children and feeding the family and whatnot.
    Probably, I won't be writing blog post much more frequently.

   It is too bad that my children object to their business being put on blast in public forums, because if they didn't, I would have a lot of interesting stories to tell, including some boy-girl drama connected with this whole house project.

    I might mention that my pot that I bought for my birthday...a pot that I have been wanting for about 3 summers now (a big one) and finally got, and that I put a beautiful hibiscus plant with coral flowers in, became broken during this adventure.I had it less than a month. And also, my scentsy warmer. Well, accidents do happen, but I just felt like throwing that out there. I might also mention that while we do have a new storage shed,  it is full of supplies and equipment, and all the stored stuff is in the backyard, and it all got rained on more than once. so i may not have anything left worth storing. Guess the chief will have plenty of room for workshoppy stuff!

My "little children" days ended long ago, and just a couple of years ago, there was just myself and Savanna to look after. Now my life is full of young children again...children who should not spend the whole summer glued to electronics. I could use some fresh ideas on how we can keep them entertained. Ages 5,4,2, less than a year, and 10.  All ideas appreciated! Anybody??

Bulletproof

     Some time ago, I read about "bulletproof" coffee. It's a Paleo thing, apparently, and it consists of coffee blended with butter...yes, BUTTER!...and coconut oil.  It did not sound at all appealing. EW was my response, to be honest.
   
     I've been struggling with my weight and healthfulness this winter, and just recently, I began to feel completely fed up with that struggle! I previously lost a significant amount of weight, and then over the past 6 months gained about half of it back. I'm fairly ticked off about that, and the fact that I did not stop that trend in its tracks when it started, and that I have not gotten a handle on it since.  Now the day has come in which I am through with that nonsense and I feel ready to rock and roll!
     Now, I am aware that there are a bazillion different lines of thought on diet/exercise/healthfulness. A bazillion opinions, books, plans, research results, etc etc etc and it seems like people can be very passionate about their own opinion on the matter, As for me, over years of experiment, struggle and research, I finally (after years of resisting and refusing to consider) tried lo carb, out of desperation, and found my "sweet spot".   Is it easy?? Not really, especially not at first. But I have found that I feel sooooooo much better both physically and mentally when I am following a lo carb eating plan. Just for clarity, the ultra lo carb period is limited, and then "healthy" carbs (from fruit and starchier veggies) are reintroduced.
     All that to say that now that I am ready to do this thing, I have a plan of action. I am doing a "carb rehab" period....2 weeks to a month, depending on how it goes...and then I am going to morph into a more Paleo type of eating, the difference being slight, but a little more interesting.
    So I decided to give bulletproof coffee a try.  According to a piece I recently read, this mess contains CLA and medium chain fatty acids that "are high quality fats that actually turn off our fat storing genes and switch on fat burning genes."

 I even went and bought a cheapie blender (my good one broke) for this project.
   

      I also bought this butter. It is from grass fed cows, and according to the packaging, it is IRISH butter, which automatically makes if far more interesting than any ole butter.

This is a tablespoon of butter and a tablespoon of coconut oil in my cheapie blender.

And this is what butter-coconut oil-coffee looks like when blended.

And here is my Irish butter coffee in my favorite latte mug! There is a nice froth on top, and it's not horrible! In fact, I kind of like it. It is better to finish up before it gets cool, though. Otherwise it starts feeling a little oily.  I have only one mug of this, and the rest of my cups of coffee are drunk black.

     These are my new purple heels! I totally dig them and they make me feel happiness.

I purchased these shoes from a garage sale! I do not like to shop much, and i'm not really into "garage sale-ing".  I am not one of those people who find the good stuff amidst the junk, and really my house has too much of my own junk in it already.  This is how it happened that I was at a garage sale where I purchased these way cool shoes:
     There is a community not far from here that holds community wide garage sales once a year. it is an annual event for some, including my sis in law. This seems to be a wealthy community, and so I suppose that their cast offs might be of higher quality than your average cast off. I am invited to go every year, and every year, I don't. Until this year. My SIL is out of town, and my mom, who I haven't  seen at all since July 2013 (that is 8 long months if your counting) is staying with the kids, who are accustomed to the yearly tradition. So, to cut to the chase, i did not want to be out and about at dark thirty in order to drive 45 minutes to shop at garage sales, but I did want to hang out with my mom. So even though I wasn't excited, and was still in the treacherous grip of the plague, I went, and I got purple heels, and had a pleasant Saturday.


   This is my pitcher collection on top of one of two of my corner china cabinets that the chief found on an online garage sale site. He does like to shop, even while working. I really dig the cabinets, and this white pitcher collection makes me really happy, particularly against the red wall!

 The largest one is new, a gift from Baby Blondie duck. She spent spring break with baby duck 3, and they went to some antique shops. 

   The past few days, I have felt like I am awakening from the winter funk. Everything seems brighter and more hopeful, including me! The mornings are beautiful, the birds are singing, the grass is greening,  and seasonal depression seems to be behind me, for which I am ever so grateful! I have spring fever something fierce....itching to spring clean, declutter, and get out in the yard!! Winter is not a good look for me, but I have three seasons between it and me now! 

Quack!