Here is my New Year post.
A few days on the late side, but it's all part of my strategy.
Not really, I don't really have a strategy, but I need one.
I am not making any resolutions, as this has never worked out well! New year, smew year...every minute is a fresh opportunity.
The last time I wrote a blog post, a dear friend requested that I think about writing a post at least once a week.
Um. I like that suggestion, but won't promise. I will, however, make an effort.
I have some blog related issues, like the lack of pictures. I know that pictures make a post more visually interesting, but I have yet to learn how to get pictures from my phone to my blog posts.
I am technologically impaired. I was going to take a class for that this semester, but now I am taking this semester off and am not sure that I will ever make it back.
Another issue is MOOD. Confession time: I'm not really Miss Strong-pants. I just don't whine in public! Sometimes, I just don't feel like I can talk without whining, so I just stay to myself. More so in the cold winter months, as I have a bit of seasonal depression going on. Does anyone really want to hear about all that? Nope. No one likes a whiner! Particularly since I, personally, have soooo much to be thankful for! A modest but comfortable home, with heat and water...I haven't gone hungry in a very long time...decent reliable transportation...a fabulous husband and solid marital relationship...technology at my fingertips...good friends and family and loved ones abound...there are so many with such bigger issues than my piddly stuff. I am very aware of all of this, and so sometimes I just don't talk when i'm feeling weary, overburdened, overwhelmed, anxious, or whatever.
So moving right along...
My oldest daughter works in the college library, and so had three weeks off. Therefore, I had three weeks off from babysitting. Now, I love that grand daughter with all of my heart and soul, but I have mentioned before that she is a firecracker! She is the energizer bunny on speed, and may or may not ever take a nap. That, in turn, keeps grammy on her toes, and PS grammy is getting older and isn't really in the best of physical health. It takes all of my resources to keep up with her all day, and then when her momma picks her up, if I have any energy left, I do my stuff. SO I was kind of looking forward to some sleeping in and some writing and some catching up with stuff...like, I still need to finish painting the living room ceiling that I started in December 2013 and still needs ONE MORE COAT...the tape is still up...
None of that happened. I can't even tell you what all has come up to prevent this vacation, but I have not had ONE uninterrupted quiet day to myself to re-charge, much less catch up with any stuff or give time or energy to working on my health.
My mother in law passed away the week before Christmas. We had gone the previous weekend to a family get together, knowing our time was short, and tragically she was already not really with us. The vigil began, and she passed away on Tuesday night, then funeral planning, and services on Friday. We got home late Saturday night, and Sunday night, my second daughter's water broke, so there was no sleeping then! My little baby grandson was born late Monday afternoon. This, of course was holiday week, and I was also preparing for then hostessing the big holiday get together/youngest's 18th birthday, which is on Dec. 25. On Saturday, I went to see New Grandson, planning on staying until New years day (Thursday.) (They live 2 hours away.) Long story short, Monday my oldest daughter and grand girls came to see the new baby and ended up getting snowed in! So there was a bunch of us in a cute but small house, and the water froze...and that was a whole new adventure. The Chief was going to come on Wed or Thursday to meet the new little fellow, and then I was going to go home with him (The Chief). But HE was snowed in at the man camp (and in fact only today made it out of there to go do a job.) SO! My oldest daughter decided to make a break for it on Wed, even though our husbands strongly discouraged us...as it turns out the weather and roads were much worse where they are/were than where we were. The roads were mostly clear and dry, and we made it home safe and sound, just in time for more weather, and it's been nothing but snow and ice since. New Year's Eve/day were uneventful, as I did not plan on being home, and my daughter went back to work on Friday, so i'm back in Chasing Audrey Trying To Keep Her Alive And Occupied mode. Today is Saturday and I babysat my niece's three young one for awhile while she went to the doc. And i'm happy to see some sun shining!! I REALLY need to go to the grocery store, but have been procrastinating because I don't want to drive on the icy snowy roads.
I want to tell the story of my new car, because it's pretty hilarious in a sad sort of way...but it seems like such an awkward story, I don't really know how to do that.
SO i'm just going to tell it because this is the true story. I had a 2012 Dodge Challenger. I really really loved that car. I got it the month before Joey died. In fact, I had not even made the first payment on it. At the time, there was only one minor child left at home and Joey, and all the other ducks were off living their own adult lives. I had one grandchild that I only saw once a year or so. I was busy adjusting to empty nest, and anyway I got this car. I was a little too excited about it, seeing as how it was just a material possession. When Joey died, I felt sure that it happened as recompense for being so happy with the car. (I know, I know, i'm just reporting the truth.) So then I hated my car for awhile, because owning it and liking it so much had caused Joey's death, but then I got over that, and I have really enjoyed it. Of course, everything changed after that, and now I have three grandchildren, two of whom I see most days, and often drive them around. The Chief has been suggesting for awhile that maybe it was time to think about getting a grammy car instead of a 2 door sports car. I saw the wisdom of that, but was really attached to my car! So we procrastinated that for awhile, but now we are facing a financial crises and it became absolutely necessary to downgrade and lower our payments. So, while I was out of town, the chief traded both of our vehicles for Nissans, which weirdly worked as far as lowering our payments and insurance substantially. I knew that was the plan, but did not know how it was going to go or what I was going to end up with until The Chief texted me a picture and said "here is your new car". Turns out, it's a Nissan Altima. Which is hilarious, as my oldest daughter and I both drove Challengers for awhile, and now we are both driving Altimas! HAhahahahahaha! Well, I haven't actually drove mine yet. As I said, this all took place while I was out of town, and when I got back home it was all icy and snowy, and so anyway, there it sits.
In case your wondering, I am not all devastated. I did really really enjoy my Challenger, and I was sad at first, but I don't feel at all sad or depressed about it now. We had a good run, and we moved on, and as it turns out, my happiness and joy in life does not depend on a car! At least I have one, and it sure is better than the beater I used to drive! In fact, I hate to admit this, but I kind of like it I think, and would actually like to take it for a spin!
Speaking of Joey, I have been dreaming about him a lot lately! I have a very odd dream fairy, and most of the time, my dreams are interesting and amusing and I actually look forward to them. Sometimes, though, I just don't know where this stuff comes from! I find it interesting that I have only dreamed about Joey very infrequently. Lately, though, I have had a few in a row, and they are so weird! What IS going on in my subconscious?? I had a couple of dreams where I knew Joey had died, but had not buried him, and was just toting him around with me everywhere. To the store, to church...and then people start telling me, you better start thinking about burying him because he is starting to smell bad. Last night's dream was just a random wierdo dream with a bunch of my bother in laws in it, and, having nothing to do with nothing, here comes Joey, walking with his arms out like a zombie! And i'm all like, hey, there is Joey! And someone else was like, ya, but he smells pretty bad .
What?? Really?? Sheesh.
SO. I guess that's it. It has taken a very long time to write this post, because I keep erasing and starting over.
Quack!
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