This shall be a photo-less post...
all of my pictures (1000+) are on my recently retired phone, and I never bothered to back anything up on icloud, because I have no clue what icloud is or how to use it.
Ergo, no pictures.
It has been a hectic, chaotic, full-on crazy few months, and frankly I am exhausted! There has been so much going on, and most of it I can't even talk about because even though these are issues and events that profoundly affect me and my life, they AREN'T MY STORIES TO TELL! So I don't even know why I am bothering to write a post!
Confession time, I guess. In the midst of all of that stuff that I can't talk about, and other stuff and taking care of a baby who just doesn't like me quite as much as she likes her mama, and hostessing Thanksgiving and what not, (the Chief was on vacation that week, but there was SO MUCH going on, we didn't have 5 minutes together, and it sure wasn't restful or relaxing!) I managed to make an A in English 1302, be highly recommended to the creative writing class, and consequently be enthusiastically invited to said class (Oh joy, oh excitement, oh happy day) all of which was a big and much needed confidence boost...but FAILED SKUNKY ALGEBRA!!!!!!!!!! Well, I ended up with a D, but I had to at least have a C to pass sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo no writing class for me. I have to take...AND PASS!!...math 0320 again. And a bunch of people to say "I told you so" to. I really have to tell you, I am so bummed and discouraged and disgusted and embarrassed and all kinds of other stuff, and seriously, I feel like just giving up. I just spent an entire semester not doing a bunch of stuff (like with the kids, or keeping up with the house, working out, finishing my painting projects, etc) so I could do this, not to mention the money involved, and now I have to do it again! I feel like i'm wasting a whole bunch of time and money and I should just forget it and go back to regular life.
But what kind of example would that be?? When the going gets tough, quit? When it's not fun and you've lost focus and feel like a big loser you should just GIVE UP?? That is what kind of example that would be, and I would strongly discourage my kids or loved ones or friends from doing that! So here I go, back to Algebra.
Also in this disastrous semester, I GAINED BACK twenty pounds. Yes, twenty. It's awful. I don't have any fat clothes left, and I darn sure am not getting any more, so I am squeezing my mass into clothes that don't fit well, and not only do I feel like I look awful but I KNOW that I FEEL awful! My joints hurt, my head hurts, I have a killer sinus issue going on, my BP is up, i'm not sleeping great, or frankly at my best mentally or emotionally....ALL of which are GREATLY improved when I eat well (IE: fresh whole home made food, no refined empty carbs or wheat, etc) and work out regularly!
So now not only do I have to retake this semester of algebra, (and pass) I also have to re-lose twenty pounds, plus some more because I wasn't actually done yet!
I'm really hoping to get it ALL back together by the time school starts again, and i'm reading a book a little at a time called "Boundaries" that the chief said I should read. Much of it makes sense, but whether or not i'm actually capable of implementing "personal boundaries" is the question!
I'm thinking of having soup and sammiches for the holiday dinner. I wonder how that would go over? :)
Now I shall share with you a nice story. I saved up a bunch of money to buy The Chief some wood working tools that he wants. He took it and ordered Joey's headstone. And then Chanelle felt like pitching in on that. So the chief has no tools, and Chanelle and her hubbies savings is smaller, but Joey is going to have a headstone soon! What a guy, huh? and what a kid!
And that's what's up! What's up with you?
Quack!
Hugs to you my friend, as tears pour down my face. Thanks for the happy ending to a sad story. Listen, you didn't fail, because you were there everyday in that stupid math class, and you passed it with a C. Next time you will pass it with a much higher grade.....like a.....C+. HAHAHA, just kidding. It will be a B+ or above for sure. We all love you, even if you gained twenty pounds, and tight clothes seem to be the norm these days. :) Go forth and be awesome. Love you
ReplyDeleteLOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!
DeleteYou're a much better person and example than I am. I'm afraid I would've run bawling and never looked back!! :-) But then you've proved over and over and over again that you are made of tougher stuff than that. The good news here (and yes, there is good news!) is that the second time around Algebra will be much easier. And hey - you won't have to buy the book again! :-) I recently read the book written by Elizabeth Smart (super good book by the way) and one thing she said in there that really meant a lot to me is that she was able to get through all the tragic things by recognizing that things could always get worse. I know that seems like a really sad thing to think about; but it is certainly true and of course YOU know that better than any of us. And seriously - 20 pounds??? Its okay, Val - skinny shows wrinkles and its not pretty!! At our age, that weight is a comfort!! :-) Well, maybe not a comfort but you know what I mean! I love what Cretia said in her comment above: Go forth and be awesome. That is so totally and completely what you do and I am thankful for your example of awesomeness. I need more of that in my life. Hug to you my very dear duck friend!!! xoxox ~ Dori ~
ReplyDeleteHaha, LOVE YOU!!! The problem with that theory is that 95% of any loss or gain is in my belly, and i look about 6 months pregnant. And it's bad for my heart. And blood sugar. :)
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